Love Is a Many Splendored Thing

I love you, not for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you - Roy Croft

When I first saw you I was afraid to talk to you, 
When I first talked to you I was afraid to like you,
When I first liked you I was afraid to love you, 
Now that I love you I'm afraid to lose you

Love at first sight is only realizing an imagination that has always haunted us;or meeting with a face, a figure, or cast of expression in perfection that we have seen and admired in a less degree or in less favorable circumstances a 

hundred times before.”

William Hazlitt

Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.Anonymous

There are very few people who are not ashamed of having been in love when they no longer love each other.
Francois

Hear my soul speak. Of the very instant that I saw you, Did my heart fly at your service   The Tempest – Act 3, Scene 1

As You Like It – Act 3, Scene 5 Who ever loved that loved not at first sight?

I prithee send me back my heart,


Since I cannot have thine;


For if from yours you will not part,


Why, then, shouldst thou have mine?


~John Suckling

A Morning that Shouldn't be Perfect

This morning is perfect. No matter that the weather is against us or that things just didn't pan out like I had wanted. For some reason no matter what the world threw at it this morning decided to be perfect. With the continuous drizzle and the fog and mist that are so dense even the empire state building is covered. It is perfection. The world woke up this morning and decided that even the weather wouldn't keep this from being glorious. Of course its not the typical glorious. Its the kind of perfection that comes from defiance and rebellion. No matter that he didn't call. No matter that he didn't text back. No matter that there was no dancing. No matter that it was shaping up to be a rather shitty weekend. Somehow.

It just feels right. Even with the fog and mist raining all over the island this is a beautifully flawless morning. Its as if the powers that be are just reminding me that life is never perfect but the moments in between are. Reminding me that a night with good friends is just as, if not better, than a night with a man. The perfection of just being with friends in a moment that although small is powerful. That alone made this potentially dreary and depressing morning just....what it should be.

I think it's also perfect because I woke up this morning knowing exactly who I am. I woke up and just knew, I knew who I was, I was complete and that feeling of solidarity is comforting. It makes that tiny flame of self contentment burn all the brighter.

Against all odds this morning is perfect.

Once Upon a Time

Once upon a time there was a little girl. She grew up in the most magical land in a beautiful castle. The castle was in the middle of an enchanted forest that was filled with many amazing and wondrous creatures. There was a dragon who lived in a cave next door and the stream that ran by her house was full of golden fish. Her parent were the king and queen of this land and she also had a little brother who was the most decorated knight in the whole kingdom. She grew up with lots of love and had all of the things any little girl could ask for.

When she was little the girl would wander around the enchanted forest and play with all of the animals. She was friends with the fawns and sprites that lived in the clearings and together they would go adventuring. The fairies who lived in the trees would bring her tiny presents that they would marvel over together. She was very happy her and her brother eventually went to school to be taught all about the wonders of the world, her favorite thing was learning about all the far off places she would someday visit. She found that books let her travel to those places so she read and read and read. She read all kinds of books. Books about those other places, books about the people, books about how things happen. She read any book she could in order to learn more.

Then one day the Queen had to go visit those far off places. She would leave for weeks and while she was gone the family felt small and incomplete but when she came home it was perfect again. She would bring back all sorts of dazzling trinkets from those far off lands. The Queen would also bring back stories of her travels in those far of places and they made the little girl want to visit them all the more. Years went by and eventually it came time for the girl to go on her journey of discovery.

Before she left her parents the King and Queen each gave her a gift. The King gave her advice, to never forget who she is, that she can do anything if she wants to and to always remember he loves her. The Queen however gave her a pair of magical shoes. No matter what happened those shoes would make everything ok and if the day was going bad all she had to do was put those magic shoes on and then it would be all better. Her brother the Knight gave her a Hug that was so full of love that even on her saddest day when she would desperately need a hug all she needed to do was think  about it and she would feel that hug again and be happy. The Dragon next door gave her a silver ring that would always remind her of where she came from so even in the darkest dark she would be able to find her way home.

She took all of her gifts and knew that with these she could do anything. She was so excited to be able to go see some of those far off places she had heard and read about. The first place she went to was the island of tall steel. It was like nothing she had ever seen before. The people were different, the trees were different, the sky was different, even the air was different. It was so exciting to be able to finally be in one of those far off places. At first it was a place of perfection a place where nothing bad could ever happen, just like home, and then after a year of living on the island of steel it happened.

The Evil thing happened. It scared her and made the place seem tainted. It was never as perfect after that Evil thing happened. It seemed like after the Evil that nothing went as magically as before. The prince she had met left and she didn't have time to explain about the Evil and how it had changed her. He just left and not even the magic shoes brought him back. She cried for days because how can you change the Evil? No matter what she did the Evil was always there. Whenever she did anything it was there trying to keep perfect from happening. The Evil scared her so much that she stopped believing in people. No matter how she tried she couldn't bring herself to trust the Island completely.

When her father the King found out about the evil he wrote her a letter. He told her that everything would be ok and even though the Evil had happened it didn't mean that all magic was gone. He told her the Evil is part of the journey and that there would be all different types of evil but that was ok. Because there was enough magic to reverse the Evil and all she had to do was find it and that she definitely had enough to dazzle. He said that with his and the Queen's love and the Knight's magic hugs she would always have enough magic to dazzle. After the King told her these things she slowly found the magic again.

But it was never the same. The magic was there but so was the Evil. No matter how much she tried, it always seemed as if the Evil found ways to ruin her dazzling. She tried so hard but no matter what she did it seemed as if she just couldn't dazzle enough.

Second Chances

They say you never get second chances in life.

I think I may have gotten one.

It rained

If you walk away it may rain
If you walk away it may hurt
But if you walk away I will be fine
When you walk away I'll still be here

you walked away

And it rained glitter from the sky



"I would rather regret the things that I have done than the things that I have not"
~ Lucille Ball ~

A State of Perfection

Its like your legs itch and you physically will not feel ok until you go on that run. If you don't then you might just explode. I got back to my tiny abode and literally dropped everything changed into my running clothes and went. No other thought about how long I would be gone or where I was planning on running. Nothing just the pure need to feel my body moving and accomplishing something physical.

Used to when I'd get these burning drives to run it would be to run hills or mountain trails the type of run that makes your legs burn for days. Now I would pay to be able to run places like that.

But here in the city its a different type of running. You can run in the parks or you can run through the city itself. Through the people the cars and the stoplights. This run is a different type of intense. Your constantly dodging obstacles and forced to acknowledge your surroundings. There is no zoning out. Rather you merge with it all. You begin to race the traffic, you can feel your heart beating with the city. The energy of this place sucks you in and forces you to adapt to it and run with it. You reach this state of absolute physical perfection.

I run here and its the same as running the most intense mountain trail. Its the kind of running where you feel the need to push yourself to the brink of it all. You push towards the pain rather than back away from it. You invite it. Challenge it. Then you reach it.

You come to that point where it hurts so badly you want to stop and cry but instead you push harder. Just to see if you can you run through it. Just to test your body's ability. You win and you move into that place where you could run forever if you wanted to. You could just keep going until you pass out or reach forever. That moment when you get there is better than...life itself. All you are is that movement, that consistent breathing, and the steady beating of your heart. You are nothing else but this flawless being moving through space. Time becomes irrelevant it doesn't matter anymore all that matters is that you keep going.

All that bothered you melts away there is nothing more important than running. You don't worry about what you look like, or what people think, or what people said, or what may happen tomorrow or even in the next hour. This is why I run. I run hoping to reach that state of perfection that could never be reached  in a gym.

Life in a Day

I hope at some point in your life you realize how amazing this life is. That you have a moment when everything is crystal clear and all of the things you think are important fall by the wayside. I hope you are blessed with a moment where you realize how petty the insignificant squabbles we have amongst one another are. That you realize that we are all the same. No matter where we come from we all fear the same and all love the same. We are the same. The accessories of our lives are just that accessories. It makes no difference what car you drive, what house you live in, how much money you make. None of that matters for the could be anyones. What matters is that we are all human. All loving. All here together.

Never say you can't.

So I hope someday you have that beautiful unbelievable moment of enlightenment when you see this life and this world as it really is. A fleeting yet never-ending kaleidoscope of moments that make this life worth living. They may not be big or important but they are all perfect and beautiful in their imperfections.