Thursday, February 24, 2011

To All My Ladies Out There

So while cruising on Facebook i ran across this note and I think it is something that all women and (some men) should remember. So to all my ladies out there; always remember that you are beautiful, powerful, and unique and if a man can't see that then he is definitely NOT worth it.  


This month, my column might turn out a little more austere (down-to-earth). Inspired (animated / induced / invigorated) by a report of a behavioural scientist in FOCUS magazine, I just had to show a different writing style. The male world is still of the opinion that men are the hunters and we are the hunted. No, not at all, my dear men, sorry to disappoint you in this matter, but you believe so because we make you believe and feel this way. There is no doubt that we have always been the hunters and you are never even aware that you have been bagged already.

If you court a lady, then only because she chooses you and allows you to play this game with her. (Since) You do not want a woman who picks up (/ goes catting for) men – at least not for a long-term relationship, do you? Yes, she is gladly welcome for a one-night stand and that was it. But if we make you feel that we are not easy to have (/ cannot be had for a song), then we signalise that you have to fight (/ pull your socks up) for us. Yet in fact, we have long decided. But how do we come to this decision?
How do we determine our Mr. Right or perhaps also Mr. Imperfect ?

Quite simply, by considering the distribution of hormones in the body, which by the way can be detected by means of measuring the lengths of both ring finger and index. Males with lots of testosterone, thus known as the real guys (/ men), have a longer ring finger. Their disadvantages: they have affairs and the testosterone affects their intelligence in a negative way. This does not necessarily mean that machos are dull, but the high quantity of testosterone does not leave much room for cognitive performance (referring to the act of thinking in general), which stands in contrast to estrogen, since it improves intelligence.

Or we move on two separate tracks. We sleep with Alpha-males, since they guarantee the optimum genetic material, but such characters also bring violence and power games along with them, they are unfaithful and they invest little. Since they are very proprietorial (/ possessive), they demand (/put their feet down for) unconditional faithfulness, which seen from my point of view should be off the cards because it is as natural as a duck takes to water.

However, you cannot expect this from a woman who selects her own sexual partners and goes hunting for them. This is why you started trying your hands on controlling us, for instance with repeated phone calls, by declaring no-gos for certain garments and by spying on us. Thereupon we have developed into talented female liars and beguilers during evolution, we had to in order to escape your control. And to still be able to go on living our own lives. This is the reason why we marry those men or live in long-term relationships with partners who are caring and tender.

And there is another variant of determining whether the male character makes a good match for the female. A few hundred milliseconds are required to make up one's mind in this matter: We are capable of weighing up strangers, we retrieve our information, for instance, from their odour, their appearance and from their body language.
Every human being has this ability, we actually get to the true bottom of it, scientists unfortunately still have no explanation of how this works. Nevertheless, whether a woman decides in favour of the tender type or opts for the macho type, the most important thing is, and will remain, to feel comfortable with everything you do. Kindest regards, Anna

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

The pointless-ness of this

So as I peruse some of the blogs I follow it occurred to me that they all have one very specific thing in common. They all have a focus be it either shoes, fashion, or man repelling they all have a point where as mine has none! (good grief this sounds way more pathetic typed out than it did in my head)

As I blurfed(blog+surfed) it became more and more apparent that I need to specify to make this blog successful. But what to focus on!? The choices are limitless! Then it hit me...my focus is on figuring out my focus! How brilliant! So here I go... again on my own, goin' down the only road I've ever known, like a drifter I was born to walk alone. Just a really dorky 80's moment there, pay no attention. As I was saying I am now off on the great quest to find my blogs manifesto!! So let the hunting begin!

Sunday, February 20, 2011

The state of Apathy

Ever since I got on the train this morning to return to the City I've been in a state of utmost lethargy and dullness. I'm not sure what is wrong but I've begun to suspect that it has to do with the fact that I am experiencing homesickness and a keen awareness of my lack of friends. Its really quite sad that my circle of  confidantes is as small as it is, the seemingly smallness of that group is intensified when I'm in the type of mood I'm in now. In this state of dissatisfaction it appears as if the number of people I can call to drag me out of it is even smaller than it is normally, which in a sick kind of way just deepens the state of monotony I'm in. How sad. Shhht whats even sadder is that I'm bogging about it.

geeze.

The feeling compounds as I realize(AGAIN!!) that my one follower is me..... good grief

Marie Antionette overload

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

The upside to being my only follower

Since I'm my only follower its rather depressing but upon further examination the whole one follower thing is probably a good thing. If people were actually paying attention to what I blog about then I would be seen as even more ridiculous than I already am, so this is definitely a great thing. I mean I have not a clue what I'm doing. I think thought that this blog will become the place where I can idealize my sadly ordinary life.

So commence the over-idealizing!!

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Sarcastic Valentine

The other day I posted a sarcastic valentine and I was amazed at the semi angry response I received. Why is it on any other day people pick up on sarcasm yet on valentines day of all days they seem to be unable to pick such things up?